What Katy Perry did last Friday night:
- danced on tabletops
- took too many shots
- maxed her credit cards
- got kicked out of the bar
- went streaking in the park
- skinny dipping in the dark
- had a menage a trois
What I did last Friday night:
- ate expired mac and cheese for dinner
- skipped “free hayride night” because it looked rainy
- did some laundry
- refreshed my Facebook newsfeed every three minutes
- was in bed by 11:00
Not me.